Saying Goodbye To 2017

In December of 2016, I was at my friend’s annual cookie party. Another guest of the party, who studies numerology, gave me a forecast for my year ahead based on my numbers. She said it was going to be my year of abundance. I lit up inside because I knew this was true. A month before, my boyfriend and I decided to pick-up everything and move to Texas so he could take the dream job he was offered. I didn’t particularly want to move to Houston, but I had been feeling unfulfilled at my current job so this was a natural transition out of it. I knew this was going to be a huge and exciting change for us. I was hopeful for whatever else these new opportunities would bring. Above everything else, I was most excited for my boyfriend and me to start this new chapter of our lives by living together. 

Within a week of the cookie party, my boyfriend’s job had fallen through and we were staying at our current location. I was devastated. In the first week of the new year, my boyfriend suffered a seizure. It was the scariest thing I have ever witnessed. In the hospital, they saw a lesion on his brain and ordered an MRI. The weeks following the seizure were hard. Between driving him to all his works stops (his license was revoked due to the seizure), doctor appointments, and wondering what caused the seizure, added a lot of stress. And then shit really got rough. He had been hiding some things from me which led us to break up. I remember crying more than I ever had in my life. I had also found out that on my birthday he asked my mom for her blessing. We were scheduled to be models for a fake wedding photoshoot with a local photographer. It was there he was going to propose. This was definitely not the year of abundance I was told about. I didn’t understand why this was happening to me. It wasn’t until my good friend and Reiki practitioner informed me that he didn’t do this to me, he did it for me. That concept was a tough one to chew. After having time to fully digest all that was happening I understood. There were things in the relationship that I hadn’t been honest about. They were not nearly as bad, but I understood why he did what he did. We eventually talked things through and gave our relationship a fresh start. After 5 years of being with someone, it’s hard to throw it all away. How will you ever get through other obstacles in the life you share together? Despite the lack of support from those closest to me, I knew in my heart I had to give him a second chance. Those closest to you always believe they know what is best for you. You can listen to their advice, but at the end of the day, you have to listen to the voice within.

In March, I finally left my job of seven years. It was a difficult transition because I would be making a lot less money but I knew I needed to switch things up. I needed to be challenged in a way that would better serve my highest self. 

The following months were extremely difficult. My health was poor and I was miserable. I felt like there was no way out. I was in constant pain. A lot of it had to do with stress. I endlessly questioned if I made the right decision by leaving my old job, mostly because of money. I was worried about my finances. My relationship with my mom and brother was suffering due to all of us living together in a tiny condo. I felt like there was a huge blockage inside of me. I was stagnant. 

The summer months transitioned to autumn and things began to fall into place. My boyfriend and I decided to finally move in together. As excited as I was, I had to release the guilt I felt by leaving my mom and brother. 

At the end of October, my boyfriend and I celebrated our six year anniversary by taking our first real vacation together to Oregon. It was there on Cannon Beach at sunrise that he asked me to marry him.

In December we made our family complete by adopting a dog. I had been talking about us getting a dog for a long time I even dreamed about it. When the opportunity arose I was so scared. I kept thinking of all the what-ifs and how we would manage. I literally felt like I was making the decision to have a child. It was my fiancé who made the decision that we had to at least go see her but we both knew on the drive down she was coming home with us. I can't even express how full my heart is now that she is a part of the family. She is the sweetest dog and is a  perfect fit for us. 

This year may have gotten off to a crazy start but these things all had to happen in order for me to learn how to navigate through them. Life is all about how you react. It’s about the lessons you are taught and what you take from them. From time to time I still question decisions I’ve made this year. Looking back, every decision I made was for my highest good. I wouldn’t be where I am right now if I didn’t. I may not be making a lot of money or living where I thought I was going to be, but I’m happy. I live in a cozy apartment with the man I love and our little fur baby. Through my new job, I’ve met so many amazing people, some now good friends, who have helped me on my healing journey. I’m happy to say that my health is improving. 

I recently spoke with the woman who studies numerology and told her how my year has been filled with abundance. She told me that this next year is all about clearing and getting rid of what no longer serves me. As I welcome the new year, I’m open to the release of that which no longer serves my highest self. I especially think this year is going to be a good one as I’ll be turning 30 in January. Happy New Year to everyone and may this new year bring only that of the highest light into your life.